Sunday, April 1, 2012

A letter to my son:


I have to tell you...I often feel challenged by you these days. You are strong willed and thick headed. You're sensitive and easily frustrated. You fly off the handle quickly. You were recently described as regularly "going postal". I won't lie, it's pretty fitting.
We often have conversations that go something like this;

You: I want apple juice.
Me: Here's your apple juice. *hands over cup*

You: I don't wanannnnnttt appllllee juuuuiicce!!! *cups hits floor*
You kick, you scream, you cry. Sometimes, you even take a swing or two. It's hard. Someday you'll read this when you are older and I just want you to know that just because I keep my calm most of the time does not mean that it's easy. Often times I'm giving you a little piece of my mind in my head. Some days I feel defeated at the end of the day, like I'm not doing enough, like you wouldn't throw such fits if I did a better job. But then

I dust myself off and try again the next day. And usually, it's a little better. We're both growing in this "terrible two's" challenge we're going through. I'm learning how to be patient, and you are learning to control your emotions and self soothe, a tough feat for a little boy.

But, here's the truth; I don't mind the challenge. Because you are worth every stinkin' rotten second of it. You are my boy. And when the fits are over, and the apple juice is cleaned up, and the tears have dried, you are the sweetest thing in the whole world. Your cuddles chase my clouds away, no matter how heavy or grey they are. Your bright blue eyes lift my spirits. And your hugs and kisses warm my heart. You are the little boy who taught me, and is still teaching me, what it really means to love someone. Each day with you makes me a stronger, better, wiser person. Each day with you makes me more comfortable in my own skin. You're sweet, silly, loving, and caring. You are my boy, and I am your Mommy. No matter how challenging your tantrums and fits become, you will always be worth the challenge. Always.

I love you sweet pea.


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